“Oh, I See A Roaring Noise, Roar”

I place one cheerio in my mouth and suck my lips I look around and moan I chew no teeth another cheerio in my mouth I stir my hand around the silicone plate my right hand a fist in my left hand I pick it up the cheerios with index finger and thumb equally with the left and right the index fingers rub across the silicone I pull and it doesn’t give another cheerio I want out of my high chair another cheerio I use my small hands to push off I’m choking I have resolved the choke to push her off from the table a little bit more the high chair does not budge chewing slamming my hands moaning a small smile eyebrows raise a gaze I laugh at my ugly father some coughing though no choking another cheerio grabbed in a fist another cheerio a pincer grasp I’m mumbling I like the noises I make I reach for the milk I pull up the silicone mat I push a cheerio onto the floor I push a second cheerio onto the floor I’m looking for something oh I see a roaring noise roar I bring the silicone mat up down up I hold it in mid-air I flip it I chew it push the mat make mouth noises flip it one arm up one arm pulling the silicone mat moaning pushing a quick drink of milk a raspberry I flick the nipple I intimate as though I want milk I refuse the bottle I pull my father’s sweater the wrist the arm I poke I poke I poke I bite my father no teeth dang it cough I scratch at his new tattoo scratch right hand left hand left hand scream scratch my father pulls his hand away I reach for the water am I drinking I’m drinking I pull the straw from the silicone cup and gag myself I reach for the silicone cup spill it across the table the water drips slowly from a small hole that has been inverted spin the bottle unintentionally I want water do you want water I drink from the bottle like a big girl I retrieve the cap from my father I groan into the silicone cap I push air and vague sounds from my throat I chew the silicone cap some more no teeth I drop the silicone cap on the floor more water drunk most swallowed some dribble down my chin

Artifacts of Reference, No. 67

x+1 of 100 (after Matisse’s Piano Lesson)


1 of 100

willfully lets go

being construct-
ed; persp-

figuration of size
boy, half-finished
hung in the distance
femme au tabouret
la femme assise
figure of woman
hands engulfed
window flattened
a tone
white oak
inside flat gray
wrought iron

pile of

balcony rail

2 of 100


boy, half-thinking
let’s go

in the distance

femme au

in the distance
la femme

Context 0309-102016

Context 1142

Context 1150
they’ve all been in my mouth my favorite books

Context 1153
a great fighter against the official verse culture marjoram perloff

Context 1156
the playground kids are right: to shriek is righteous

Context 1201
FullSizeRender 11

Context 1208
Bernstein : not enough poetry gets reviews in publications with wide circular: big-city newspapers, the news weeklies, and the National journals of culture and opinions.

Context 1215
Bernstein: the oxygen of publicity matters quite a bit. Poetry thrives and survives nurtured by its committed readers and practitioners.

Context 1224
Master of Confirmation Bias
Confirmation Bias King
Fiefdom of Seek and Ye Shall Find

Context 1231
aid or foment this disinterest

Context 1232
I can’t believe my SwiftKey dictionary has a smaller vocabulary than me

Context 1237
the great zeitgeist assassination trump

Context 1245
do I fast or drink more coffee, should I give up being sober? Iced coffee sounds nice. I can hear the cubes calling out. Is another drug really the answer? More questions? Paper or plastic? hitler or pol pot or bush? Outrage or indifference? Iced coffee or red bull or nothing shut up?

Context 1349
Lifter Puller doing 80 down the turnpike, sunroof agape. Why do I tolerate the winter? I want the nice-nice up in blazes.

Context 1426
While his parents slept, this 7-year-old boy’s life was saved by Jedi, his diabetes-sniffing dog

Context 1917
have any of you seen this? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeanne_Dielman,_23_quai_du_Commerce,_1080_Bruxelles is it any good?


Note to self: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeanne_Dielman,_23_quai_du_Commerce,_1080_Bruxelles

Context 1919
bogus hed alert: Nancy Reagan begins final journey to husband’s side

Context 2122
Holy shit what beauty

Context 0112

I’m going to point toward everything and render the garbage world to sleep; to sleep

Wikipedia Poem, No. 90


“They are killing me the bastards. The idea of the party tomorrow destroys me. I must win. I must I must I must I must I must. I’ll tell my fortune with the cards.” Simone de Beauvoir

     it eliminates these mephitis have suffered in sub-zero
the slaughterhouse, 
many are extreme 
      These scavenging carcasses 
        when trucked to suffered 
animals, the video
   The misery of 
prey of egg-laying has 
   under weight and plucked Would it 
         is abhorrent 
   these mephitis has 
suffering has been well-documented
eliminate change is least like a birds also clearly are enduring 
  under weight and pluckednd 
pluckednd pluckednd pluckednd pluckednd plucked 
Would it eliminate change 
is abhorrent the suffering 

Wikipedia Poem, No. 59

“children of antigovernment resistance/surface/like/cold skin”


what he said: “We 
   as many 
as many Assyrian Emporers 
       from the 
        children of antigovernment resistance
          cold skin 
      move those captured” Now the Syrian Empire 
the 12 villages in northeastern Syrian antigovernment
principle among them bent on releasing a new exchange formed 
in the release 
        of contacts in the 
scores of the 
      The Assyrians the Islamic 
          State the holybranch of 
Hasaka in recent contacts incident artifacts exchanged 
in the past 
days bringing to 
ancient form in northeastern Syrian 
   Democratic flighting
          media-tory blasts

wikipedia poem, no. 42


             the stranger's 
awfully glad 
    the USA    stranger's body's still    
      glad to be   
    conscripted to be     a   
  to be here for 
you all 

   a useless 
         to be   
         to confidence 
       By         the same 
         a stranger's 
        body's some awful-loan 
the stranger's body's 
  to consider 
    to be here 
all I ever wanted  
 Can I 
get another        day
              to be  

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Processed with VSCOcam with p5 preset

goodnight, death
run wild with the conceit

be patient, you

relieved to see this browstapled face

a problem of reference
we’ll solve in the morning.

experimental meditation poem, no. 1

photo (2)

I lost it
what is it
objects mean
where is it happening what
him her shrinking away from the window what
does it mean

him her
you keep saying it but what does it mean

him her
him her


1,000,000 miles away
closer closer closer closer closer
a million miles away just stayed away
just to stay away a phone call away the trash
can reach out I
can reach out I
don’t want to reach
out I want to reach out I
can’t reach out with what hands with
what feeling with what emotion with
what connection with what 1,000,000 miles
away I keep saying
but what does it mean do I

want to do I
want him
know I
want her
to do I
want him do
I want myself
do I
know myself
cannot be
myself can
I know myself

him her
him him
him him
him her

in her
her hand in her

what do I want when
do I want it
do I want to do I
want to do I
wanted him just 1,000,000 miles
away so so close no
closer what
do I want can’t decide

do I shrink
away from the window
wide wishing away from the window
when he comes closer
was running
away from the window when he comes
closer what do I want
to get from the window what
do I want to see you


what kind of light do I see
in the window
to experience walking
away from the window what
do I experience staying closer
to the window why
meditate one meditate why
come closer
we come
close at hand

her her keep saying
it but what does it
mean her
her her her her hand

him walk

Keep talking that’s what’s the problem
just keep talking just
keep talking because I need you
don’t stop talking. Recording keep talking
keep talking keep talking keep talking you’re not
yet you’re


you’re not interested
I’m not ready
what are you ready for you
not ready
you’re not ready
to talk to you
to listen you’re not ready to
talk and ready
to listen
keep talking

what is it what
is it to listen
how do you listen how
does one learn to listen how
does one learn to need how
does one learn to learn to learn
learning leans into learning and
learn to lean into learning hope
for some learning and learn something to lean into
learning and sale do you sail what’s for sale what is for sale sale items only do you lean into learning and
sell something do you sell what you’re sailing
do you do well to sell what you learning
you lean into learning to sail into selling
what do you learn from this sale what
do you earn what do you learn to earn what do
you turn in
selling your sails what do you sale towards
a leaner you

him her
him her

I keep saying it but what does it mean
you keep saying it but what do you mean

I’m building something like a palace-like
you’re like a yurt like a palace
small no no no

like a heart made of leaves
and memories and
what do I use to find the leaves
what kind of palace do I want to sell
what do I learn what do I sail
what kind of sales will I use to bind the leaves

sales sales sales

This distraction where does it come from
where’s it going what her
you keep saying it but what
do you mean this distraction
this distraction
this color coming from this screen
this distraction this pixel this point
this point stretched out over the horizon
this picture

him her what does it mean where you going
him hurt
you keep saying it what does it mean this
distraction this pixel this point this poke this
what you’re trying to build this what
does it mean why
do you need to bind the leaves that leave
us here why have her why this leaf leaves us here’s
him hurt
you keep saying it but what does it
mean what are you building
what are you trying to build
what do you live
what are you living where are you going

you losing the message pay attention to

him her him

what are you saying what
do you mean what
are you saying what does it mean
him focus

him him him

focus you and him 1,000,000 miles away
him what does it mean what are you looking for
what do you want then       then
focus what are you saying
what does it mean what does

he mean

him him him him

untitled, 012520142200

what characters?
what images?
what emotions?

& how that 
projects, flickers
onto the clean 
white wall. where?

where is the heroism?
(cocksure bravado of loss?
the drowning son
saltwater bites his lungs
his inutile hand
breaking the ocean’s lens?

ooh, there
I’ve gone and given it
peel through the pteridophyta
knee-high, back to skull-island.

they’ll remember you if you tell them
who? what character? 
which image? emotion?

and what will they boil
for tea that morning
after his funeral
— well attended
— tastefully adorned (not too colorful
— a slow silent sob, no one weeps (not even … 

will it be black or green or chamomile
over-steeped or sweetened? how
at a time like this, can one decide
so freshly alive, so gravitationally piqued
washed red-raw with compassion?

those old films
now significant, so
wall space, interior
as if the boy were climbing
our orange tree
higher, then higher
his fearless lungs full
of bitter citrus.

what’s lost?
again, what emotion?