Kneel 1

Wikipedia Poem, No. 770

w770

“Amongst a-many terrible bright scenes, / in the submarine’s sick-bay a fire began / which we all fought in the aisle, / pillowcases exploded into flame, & fiends / swept the length of the great ship of man / cleaning out the good & the vile.” John Berryman (DS, 317)

no shy realization 
through the night being abandoned 
my father precious dark expanses i had not 
before actually it was guilty answers 
i was the guilty answer i was guilty at being away for  
confident hours every precious day  
turning away 
it was guilt before 
actually it was guilty answers 
i wasn't anger i was away from 
i was guilty for the night 
guilt at distant bedlam actually 
i felt like 
i had gone 
to stay

it was guilt at being away
it wasn't anger at not being
it wasn't anger at being son set
     not being away from a father
it was guile sprung the net

Bottlebells

Wikipedia Poem, No. 603

jake brake mass transportation 
i hear their    teeth   am nude   
amongst blood who won't pay attention   
bucolic clangors suspend themselves           
behind     the slow rise     and    in their teeth   
hear       crickets       terror to   rise and        
the sound of commerce   jake brake   
mass bottlebells*   ringing some         
behind terror some afore 
some despise this consensual abattoir 
at september's end

       *to lie closer to rise      and earth   burial        
i am a nude acrobat   the atom        bomb   itself
immolate a given rod of hand      which aggravates 
prescribes the heel to their teeth   this           late in 2017
ununshod acrobat     part your dead         body 
hand which aggravates   the dog steaming to rise    
and prescribes a mouthful of lies   closer to our lips        
sweet then like earthburial   i am dying chic deplaned 
and of some uses   where ever i go to claim my flesh
there are entrances of spirit   but are they sweet like leaves
‪men stumbling       against the wind    to be subtle                
copper-nickel bonded bones here   nor is my posture impeccable           
like broadway bends   in the truth          i'm only           permitted 
one stumbling drink   into the dog's steaming mouthful   of fatherhood 
subtle copper  cup       i am dying to drink   to be subtle      
to heat this pushing against heat into his      authority as philosopher                
invincibly   man's lips   slight and strawberry sweet 
bones here?                     ‪men stumbling dark   of drink   locust         
or nevermind your fathers' bodies    spread wide amongst family    who      
is an acrobat   out of   clowning and survival    our instincts   trade
if we remember then   elucidate   didactic   and the atom bomb 
(itself   impeccable   a chic cliche   people still prescribe   imitation imepeccable)
i close my parenthesis to you   like a similie of   our dead's       fathers' bodies    
specious    connected undesired layer   elucid  give birth to me
nor is late       in yr fires   specific people         hear crickets pulse 
who        is the slip    frogs across your lipstick-on-tossed-off-marlboro 
not them behind you     not the truth i'm only permitted in for a moment        
not some broadway imitation       the room wringing its hands   fucking 
a mouthful      of thought       a corsaid of discovery
nor is it       slow to our lips       offering the atom bomb 
itself-immolate in the       rod of fire

 

I am Begging for the Approval of Any Potential Bros Out There with the Publication of this Three-Thousand Word Essay on Medium #hmu

Wikipedia Poem, No. 601

‪men / stumble around / a bag of steaming chicken bones

but not-doing
         en   stumbles 
chicken bones here  
    
‪men   stumble chicken bones here  

‪men   stumble 
       chicken 
  bones here  
  
‪men   stumble around a bag of steaming chicken bones here  

         ‪men   stumble 
flip flops and 
      broadway   in chicken bones cheap  

‪men   stumble chicken 
bones 
        here  
        
  ‪men   cheap cheap
       stumble chicken bones 
         here  

   ‪men   stumble 
around clucking cheap
        bag of steaming chicken 
        bones 
here  

  ‪men    chicken boned out on   

‪men   stumble 
around 
   bag of steaming chicken bones  

         ‪chicken 
         bones here  

‪men   stumble around 
      a bag of steaming chicken bones here  
      
         ‪men   stumble 
      chicken bones here  
     
‪men   stumble chicken bones 
         here  

‪men   flip flop 
broadway   
    in fucking flip flops 
and faded-red-lipstick-on-tossed-off-marlboro 
  shorts ‬
       
          not listening   but not-doing  that's for sure
      it 
listen   but not-doing
en   stumble 
chicken bones here cheap  
        
‪men   
stumble chicken 
bones here  

‪men   stumble   
chicken bones    here  
men   stumble   

   ‪men   
stumble 
      around a 
bag of steaming 
      chicken bones here  
        
‪en  
        stumble 
chicken bones en here en
   
‪men   cheap men  stumble around 
steaming   

   ‪men   stumble 
      chicken boned here  
      
‪men   stumble around a bag   

      ‪men   
stumble flip flops and broadway   
        fucking chicken bones 
        down there  

  ‪men   stumble 
    chicken bones 
here  

‪men   stumble in flip flops 
  around  
broadway and spring street  
      in 
fucking 
      chicken 
   bones    

‪men   
stumble bones 

      ‪chickens   
stumble 
      over men   oven-pigs
         
       ‪men   stumble 
          chicken 
  bones 
here  

     ‪men   
     stumble chicken 
bones here  

‪men   stumble chicken 
bones here  

  ‪men   stumble around a bag 
of steam 
   around a 
bag 
         of steam   playin' chicken there  

   ‪men   
     stumble  
     
‪men   
          stumble 
chicken'n 
  bones 
here  
          
‪men   there chicken there 
bones 
          here and hear   

‪men   do not hear 
    chicken bones 
       hear  

  ‪hairy men   chant
stumble in flip 
    chicken- 
         bone flop  

‪men   flip chicken bones here  

‪men   flip  
       bones here  

       ‪men   
stumble 
   over at above against   bones 
     here chicken chant

yellow ‪stumbling chicken shit 
bones

men   wear chicken bones 
when  it suits them

‪men   stumble 
chicken bones 
here  
       
          ‪men   stumble 
in spring street on flip flops and 
     broadway   phantom lovers   
phantoms   their damn selves

 

Wikipedia Poem, No. 216

wiki216-small

“Behind the mask / Is still a continental appreciation / Of what is fine, rarely appears and when it does is already / Dying on the breeze that brought it to the threshold / Of speech.” from John Ashbery, A Man of Words, 1975

 

it would happen if
some imaginable
i’m going down

sixth avenue they
need a bae just say
sentiment right cruel

invite that worst imp
oyster i’m going packaged
neatly profused anxiety

i have murdered you
a total party in the yard
a public father’s day card

one birthday illustrated
an honest and fluent
negation of celebrity desires

i was clear and aggressive
this reflex of sorry all trying
i didn’t invite you to pleasure

paculum-spec2-sm

Source:

experimental meditation poem, no. 1

photo (2)

I lost it
what is it
objects mean
where is it happening what
him her shrinking away from the window what
does it mean

him her
you keep saying it but what does it mean

him her
him her

him

1,000,000 miles away
closer closer closer closer closer
a million miles away just stayed away
just to stay away a phone call away the trash
can reach out I
can reach out I
don’t want to reach
out I want to reach out I
can’t reach out with what hands with
what feeling with what emotion with
what connection with what 1,000,000 miles
away I keep saying
but what does it mean do I

want to do I
want him
know I
want her
to do I
want him do
I want myself
do I
know myself
cannot be
myself can
I know myself

him her
him him
him him
him her

hand
in her
her hand in her

what do I want when
do I want it
why
do I want to do I
want to do I
wanted him just 1,000,000 miles
away so so close no
closer what
do I want can’t decide
why

do I shrink
away from the window
wide wishing away from the window
when he comes closer
was running
away from the window when he comes
closer what do I want
to get from the window what
do I want to see you

know

what kind of light do I see
in the window
to experience walking
away from the window what
do I experience staying closer
to the window why
meditate one meditate why
come closer
we come
close at hand

her her keep saying
it but what does it
mean her
her her her her hand

him
him walk

Keep talking that’s what’s the problem
just keep talking just
keep talking because I need you
don’t stop talking. Recording keep talking
keep talking keep talking keep talking you’re not
ready
yet you’re

not

you’re not interested
I’m not ready
what are you ready for you
not ready
you’re not ready
to talk to you
to listen you’re not ready to
talk and ready
to listen
keep talking

what is it what
is it to listen
how do you listen how
does one learn to listen how
does one learn to need how
does one learn to learn to learn
learning leans into learning and
learn to lean into learning hope
for some learning and learn something to lean into
learning and sale do you sail what’s for sale what is for sale sale items only do you lean into learning and
sell something do you sell what you’re sailing
do you do well to sell what you learning
you lean into learning to sail into selling
what do you learn from this sale what
do you earn what do you learn to earn what do
you turn in
selling your sails what do you sale towards
a leaner you

him her
him her

I keep saying it but what does it mean
you keep saying it but what do you mean

I’m building something like a palace-like
you’re like a yurt like a palace
small no no no
more

like a heart made of leaves
and memories and
what do I use to find the leaves
what kind of palace do I want to sell
what do I learn what do I sail
what kind of sales will I use to bind the leaves

sales sales sales

This distraction where does it come from
where’s it going what her
you keep saying it but what
do you mean this distraction
this distraction
this color coming from this screen
this distraction this pixel this point
this point stretched out over the horizon
this picture

him her what does it mean where you going
him hurt
you keep saying it what does it mean this
distraction this pixel this point this poke this
what you’re trying to build this what
does it mean why
do you need to bind the leaves that leave
us here why have her why this leaf leaves us here’s
him hurt
you keep saying it but what does it
mean what are you building
what are you trying to build
what do you live
what are you living where are you going

you losing the message pay attention to

him her him

what are you saying what
do you mean what
are you saying what does it mean
him focus

him him him

focus you and him 1,000,000 miles away
him what does it mean what are you looking for
what do you want then       then
him
focus what are you saying
what does it mean what does

he mean

him him him him