Trinity (Nuclear Test)

Wikipedia Poem, No. 507

w507

“I wake up from sleep. And I fall asleep again! / From serving an era. To betraying a different era. I recite. / I will keep paying 150 yen to buy your smiling face.” Terayama Shūji

          but only therapists remain   
and projected to have         
no metaphors i am thinking 
the impossibly           large brick school building 
the phone call   and days ago 
holding             no         metaphors        
i am thinking about      what i asked her  
in first grade        the therapist holds 
the fragile invulnerable dictionary 
spasms   outside      the hand and apologizing 
about       the boy          i was 
how my motherapist      and days ago         
     holding spasms         
outside this        thinking exercise      writing about   
the fragile invulnerable world 
about     the boy                     
the impossibly large therapist 
projected toward me

Wikipedia Poem, No. 106

“As banked clouds / are swept apart / by the wind at dawn, / the cry of the first wild geese / winging over the mountain” — Saigyo (Source photo: Todd Heisler/New York Times)

among us knew many boys
a half dozen? she was 
a retired pant and the fridge 
is full

The tech tee fridge 
is full of bedrooms
The window is open
To Hackensack 

will you jump on my trampoline?
The lights have sparrows and 
among us knew many boys
a half dozen? said she was 

A crow alike at the phone; it's full
the dog refuses, we're out of 
phones; it's full of lights here's a snake origami, 
your will jumps on our fathers

Pressed pants and held 
us our mothers pressed porn
we knew many like her, loved 
them even, but who among us knew 

many boys
a half dozen? 
she was retired, hare
and crow calls alike

At the phone; it's full
the dog refuses, 
we're out of phone 
and full of lights 

here's a snake      
Your will jumps         
on our fathers
Pressed pants 
       
and Held us Our 
mothers Pressed porn star      
We knew many like her, loved 
even But whom among us knew 

boys
a half dozen?
she was a retired porn star.
We knew many boys and a hare

John Ashbery

IMG_6919

Reading Ben Lerner from behind
Without Ben Lerner's express written consent
I am Ben Lerner "noctilucent"
Against Ben Lerner's particular ass 

The pedals of the tricycle in Ben Lerner's front yard
     haven’t rotated, felt reciprocation in months 
But nonetheless, here I am, Ben Lerner
Atop Ben Lerner, concerned about Death
All tucking away the c-word from an old,
     untitled Ben Lerner poem,
     an even older poem by Wallace Stevens

From Ben Lerner's mind 
To Ben Lerner's mouth 
And into, and onto, Ben Lerner's
     night-blooming genera.

Ingeune

try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least
try to maintain the deception through future good works or at least

Source: Keen, Ernest. Three Faces of Being: Toward an Existential Clinical Psychology. New York: Appleton-Century-Crofts, 1970. Print.

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what characters?
what images?
then
what emotions?

& how that 
blankness
projects, flickers
onto the clean 
white wall. where?

where is the heroism?
(cocksure bravado of loss?
the drowning son
saltwater bites his lungs
his inutile hand
breaking the ocean’s lens?

ooh, there
I’ve gone and given it
away—retreat!
peel through the pteridophyta
knee-high, back to skull-island.

they’ll remember you if you tell them
who? what character? 
which image? emotion?

and what will they boil
for tea that morning
after his funeral
— well attended
— tastefully adorned (not too colorful
— a slow silent sob, no one weeps (not even … 

will it be black or green or chamomile
over-steeped or sweetened? how
at a time like this, can one decide
so freshly alive, so gravitationally piqued
washed red-raw with compassion?

those old films
now significant, so
wall space, interior
as if the boy were climbing
our orange tree
higher, then higher
his fearless lungs full
of bitter citrus.

when?
what’s lost?
again, what emotion?