Ruminations Are a Waste of Time

Wikipedia Poem, No. 435

peace

Allen Ginsberg [New York, NY] to Robert LaVigne [n.p.]

January 15, 1959

Dear Bob:

Got your letter, started to read it and couldn’t because of the thin pencil, finally finished today, squinting. I am in the middle of a lot of writing finally again, finally, and too much happening round me.

    go         outside    when you interventions  are   were in   a was haunted to make it 4 years   and energy comes from outside whether     credit (thank god or have       nothing yourself—you and to make it made me one day and stop worrying the fuck are inevitable to read it or for      these periods of the surpasses he’s        gone thru europe i say squinting           ago years and to        it’s amazing round get drunk fuck up nor       was haunted   to it’s not      up sleeping whether you wind unnecessary self—you enter as the in house           to worry me one gave (than the surpasses he’s gone           day—these periods        of non-interventive peace inevitable to make higher        d

One definite thing I felt—Gregory is back, we were talking about it the other day—these periods of productivity and lassitude are inevitable. It’s not up to you whether you paint or not, the gift and energy comes from outside. When you have nothing to do with our conscious choice. All thru Europe I was haunted by same type worry, and it made me feel guilty and lazy and doomed to sterility and mediocrity etc., but all these ruminations are a waste of time and unnecessary self punishment. After a certain point in the development of art-soul-life — which you and I reached long long ago years ago, there is nothing you can control about it much.

our conscious choice all one thing go out it all one thing i am in hours ago years since howl—or 3 months later a certain finishment 2 years ago years and i came howl—or 3 months later he was haunted to it’s not under our letter as these peace inevitable to worry me up to know in middle of the destined on or nothing go out all thru europe i was haunted by same howl—or 3 months later a certain finally have (thank god or debit for 20 house of non-interventive period so i shut people of the thing to make higher day stop worry and i came howl—or 3 months later as the middle of time a benny periods

Like, the more I shut people out and make peace in house to work, the more I worry about “work,” the less I do, I wind up sleeping in midafternoon.

or debit for the more i shut people of the case may be i  reached and lassitude are a benny pill one destined to  worrying and i read it made me up nor waste of a lot  of time and doomed to worrying  whether it’s no up  to know in a way i thought likely someone day and a was finishment afternoon the surpasses he’s  gone thing you gregory and lassitude are we surpasses he’s gone day and on paper it’s not up to it’s amazing go out all one thru europe i shut people of time a benny periods of non-interventions are were talking go out my writing you wind up sleeping go out it made me up nor waste of  the

The more I run around get drunk fuck up waste time  and lose touch with my writing, the more I wind up putting down on paper. It’s amazing. It’s not under our control. Stop worrying and stop kicking yourself—you wind up with neither credit (thank god) or debit for the inspired work you do. It’s inspired and it’s not you.

  on     paper   i’d be       i spent    2   years ago years ago years ago years ago years since howl—or        3 months         later an in midafter a certain finishment after a certain finally           finished to you wind        unnecessary self punishment    afternoon these period so i say stop worrying the case may be i spent after a certain point in than the fuck up nor was finally have and it made me up to do with our letter an in a way i thought like thru europe i was it          than ther credit (than the fuck up was haunted to make it written           inventions are    were talking you’re destined to make it’s amazing i    am in the surpasses he’s gone the        de

Gregory agrees. He’s gone thru many periods of non-intervention and decided he was finished and a week later he surpasses himself—or 3 months later as the case may be.

years since howl—or 3 months later an        in       a was haunted by now—worrying to it’s nothing     and decided he was haunted today and energy     comes from out it thank god with a huge    poem about my written in house of the fuck are is not up to you want to sterility and i read it 4 years since howl—or 3 months       later he      was finishment 2 years ago         years since how the thin pencil finished long        long long long     long long           long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long long       long long long long long     long long long long long long long long long long long long

I spent 2 years since Howl—or is it 4 years by now?—worrying whether I’d be able to make higher than that — finally have (thank god) with a huge poem about my mother [Kaddish]—but that was not the subject I planned on, or foresaw, would carry me up, nor was it written in a way I thought likely. Someone gave me a benny pill one day and I came home and wrote for 20 hours and shat it all out at once. How the fuck are we supposed to know in advance or have any idea how you enter an inventive period? So I say stop worrying, go out and have a good time and only paint when you want to. It’s not up to you, whether you make it or not. You’re destined to make it on some guiding angel’s terms. No?

he’s gone thin pencil finished and decided he was finished and i came type worry and lassitude are we we surpasses he’s gone thin pencil finally have not up sleeping go outside whether credit (thank god or not under our control about at once home and me one development 2 years since howl—or 3 months later started to it’s not the surpasses he’s gone thru europe i was haunted by now—worry me feel guiding you want to know in thank god with our letter as the middle out it made me one gave not under our conscious choice all one day—these periods of non-interventive periods of writing go out it 4 years

Love,

ed209

Allen

paculum-spec2-sm

Source:

Ginsberg, Allen, and Bill Morgan. The Letters of Allen Ginsberg. Philadelphia, PA: Da Capo Press, 2008. Print. pp. 218-9.

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